Cars I wouldn't buy

I like cars. I even like Top Gear. I'm sorry, I know it's not green or politically correct, but I do. Not in an obsessive, knowing the difference between a Ferrari AK47 and a Maserati B52 sense. But I'm rather fond of cars and play the 'what I'd buy if money were no object game' with the best of them. But sadly I've had to add another marque to the list of cars I wouldn't touch with the proverbial barge pole.

I'm not going to bore you by going through the whole list, but you know the kind of thing. I would never, for example, by a BMW because of... well, the kind of people who buy BMWs. (Except you, of course, if you have a BMW. You are clearly an exception because you read this blog. But think about buying something else next time, okay?)

Up until recently I rather liked Audis. Okay, they're just tarted up VWs, but they are often very nice tarted up VWs. Unfortunately they then came out with their new lights. I'm sorry, I can't take seriously (and certainly couldn't pay cash for) a car with sidelights that form a long curvy line. It's just so chavvy. Why don't they go the whole hog and string blue LED fairylights around the skirt of the thing? They really make me shudder. So there we go. Audis are off the list until they see sense. Vorsprung has left the room.